Things that cannot possibly be explained

1. I have glitter on my neck. My kids have it on their feet. Lucy says Alice put glitter on the pillows to attract fairies. But at what point did they step on the pillows, and why didn't I feel it when they kicked my neck?

As I is a thing that cannot be explained.

2. Alice calls her Magic 8 ball Larry.

This cannot be explained.

3. Why are my children quiet only when they are being naughty? Don't I deserve peace and quiet without their secretly dyeing toilet paper with food coloring and stuffing it into clear glass Christmas ornaments so they can pretend to be Misfortune Tellers?

Hmm. Maybe that one is obvious.