A Wee Update from Hollywood

We're back in Los Angeles to play another round of Let's Audition for Something and See How It Goes. And as bad as everyone says rejection is, I am here to tell you that Tinseltown has nothing on the playground. Seriously. So far, school has been more soul-crushing than the vast entertainment machine, which says something about the bravery of everyday kids.

That said, I have had one wild dream dashed. Adam* told me the laundromat across the street would wash and fold our dirty goods for a dollar. A DOLLAR? I thought. SIGN ME UP. I planned to pretend that I didn't feel terrible for the poor stranger who had to wash my unmentionables.

When I dropped off the laundry, they immediately weighed it. That's never a good sign. Seriously. Who deals with scales? Medical examiners, circus sideshow acts, butchers: all menacing in their own ways.

The laundry people wrote up my bill and added a dollar on top--so there was a dollar involved, even though it was a dollar involved with many others of its kind. Enough that they could swiftly people a commune were they actually people.

But anyway. We have clean clothes.

Yesterday was a day full of errands. In addition to having other people do my laundry, I also filled out paperwork. By myself. Because no one will do that, not even for a dollar. I also bought a cheap vacuum cleaner because the apartment we are living in belongs to a bachelor and let's just say the one he has is lacking in the suck department. Or it's abundant. Either way, it does not work.

Then I had to pick up the girls' headshots and drop them off at the agent's. And then pick up my clean, folded laundry. This sounds like nothing, but when you have to drive across Los Angeles several times in one day, facing traffic, helmet-less bikers, and police offers going 15 miles under the speed limit for no apparent reason, which is strangely alarming, you realize it's an ordeal.

 

 

 

 

 




The moment we stepped in the apartment, sweating profusely into the next round of laundry, I got an email from Alice's agent, letting us know she has an audition for a movie role as a frighteningly smart 8-year-old going on 18. So basically, as herself. If she were to get the role, she'd travel to Southeast Asia for filming. Whoa!

There was just one problem. She was in Seattle for orchestra camp. I called Alice to see what she wanted to do, and we agreed that the movie audition was a cool opportunity. Then I tracked down Adam, who found Alice a ticket, and put her on a plane that arrived just before midnight. I picked her up at LAX, threw her into bed, and we have been rehearsing her lines since the girls woke up too early this morning.

Lucy, who as usual is being a good sport about not winning the audition lottery, has been coaching Alice on the emotions she needs to show for this audition: fear and misery. Let's just say Lucy believes in method acting, and Alice has had to call a couple of timeouts. 

But we're in for an exciting day. The floor and most of our clothes are clean. Whatever happens, we're having fun. I couldn't ask for much more than that. (Except for the dogs and Adam to be here with us.)

 

 

* His real name, for maximum humiliation.